We're Doing It AGAIN!!!

Yes, please get the rolling of the eyes, they "holy shits", the "wow, so soon(s)" comments out of your system before reading on...

It's "un"official but because I have an extremely large family who already knows and a 3 year old son that has not stopped talking about it since the day he found out I decided that I probably ought to tell people before I get the "why didn't you tell me(s)" So, yes, Tim and I have been blessed with baby number 2 (4). I found out after much procrastination last Friday. Tim has been telling me he thinks I am pregnant by the way I am acting, I have been schulffing it off saying he's nuts. Yes, I admit, I have been more "bitchier" than normal, but I just can, I'm the mommy and I can. So we actually made a bet at dinner last Friday night that I am, so of course I hate to lose so I bought a test and when we got home ran right upstairs and took it and honestly I didn't think it would be positive but their was no 2 minute wait, that sucker was positive immediately. I began to cry, out of excitement/holy shitness/what am I going to do now/nerves/I lost a bet. All the emotions just came screaming down and just like with Kara I sat in the bathroom close to an house wondering what to do, "how am I going to tell my parents" much like a teenager would wonder but then I realized that even though I have 3 kids and my life is crazy and people look at us funny, I am married, own a home, have a full-time job, and pay my own bills, and have a very supporting husband with an amazing and rewarding job, so what am I worried about. I cried most of Friday night watching Kara play and just be so "grown up" She played with Brandon and us and I just cried. I can't believe she will be 1 next week, I am just at awe and I can't even talk or type about it because tears come to my eyes. My baby that I have dreamed and prayed for is growing up. It will be hard to have another one when I have given so much love to this little girl. It shall be interesting.

On that note, she has grown to be the walker/talker. She is so darn funny that I often just watch her without her knowing and laugh because of the things she does. With the help of Tyler she has learned that cars go on the floor and make the "Raspberry" sounds and that its fun to try to race cars, she has learned to fight and stand up for herself when her brother tries to take a toy away. Whether it be slap or hit or pull hair she will get her toy back or the one he has because she is the princess. Yes, we do punish her after we get done laughing! She has begun taking Mom and Tot swim lessons at the YMCA on Wednesday night. She is funny splashing and playing with other kids, she continues to go to "Ona's" and has actually learned a lot from playing with other children, actually today, she didn't want to leave! Because of her attitude and personality she has landed herself in Time Out at Fiona's a couple of times, she just thinks the word NO is too funny.

Tyler continues to make WONDERFUL strides at Preschool. He as well as Kara have learned that Mommy and Daddy don't have to be around 24/7 and that being away for a while is cool. I have a hard time getting him to leave school and just before Christmas he would whine and cry when he would see me at school, now he looks at me, blows me a kiss and continues what he is doing. I'm still so proud of him and what he has accomplished. We still have issues with his behavior at times, but we may have pinpointed much of that with being tired. We are still in the process of potty training, its getting better with the help of school. His speech is improving and he now has imaginary friends so when he thinks we aren't listening he jabbers to his friends. And my most favorite and recent thing is that he now says KARA not KWAWA. It's so unbelievably cute, his R's have made progress. Presently I am listening to Tyler scold his teachers Bridget and Kristin and his friends Anna, Cassie and Nate...all real people but not in my house!

Brandon has started playing the recorder for music class so currently I am listening to him toot his horn in his bedroom after an hour of "Mom, listen to this, do you like this song" Mom, I now know what you had to deal with; I'm sorry. Brandon has also started swim lessons on Wednesday night and swims like a fish. He will be our swimmer, we hope he continues to like it and excel in something he likes.

Tim also started back school last night. It was nice to have a month off with him being home, but it was a quick month and believe me we found stuff to do on those "off" nights. It seems we are still constantly on the go to where we had to change routine of things. We try to either eat really early (now that I get home at 2:45...love the school system) or really late like after swim lessons. But lately, while Tim works we like to stay in on cold nights (like tonight) and be in our pj's by 4!!! It's 5:10 and I'm looking forward to bed...sad isn't it.

I haven't been to the doctor yet, and I hate to jinx stuff, but hopefullly all is well. Everyone at work is taking bets because they laugh at me because I honestly don't know my last period, I haven't had one in so long. So today a co-worker really asked me, what would you do if they said you were due like next month? I laughed and then thought about that in depth...wow, February 6th can't come soon enough. Thanks to the Baby Boom at Fort Drum it's almost impossible to see a doctor.

Sorry for the long update, but I haven't updated on everyone in a while!! XXOO

Resolutions 2009

Oh, as many people say..."same resolution shit...different year" Yup, that's me...for the 5th year in a row, same resolution. I think my resolution last year might have been split between weight and giving birth to what I thought was a HUGE baby last year at this time, but obviously my plan backfired...not only didn't I lose weight, but the baby waited 27 more days to come out!!

This year, I've honestly, truly, compasionately (sp) taken a whole new step on not only "weigh loss" per say, but "healthier styles" I have finally hit rock bottom and been in a "funk" for about a week or two. It officially hit this past weekend. I weighed myself at my mothers and as much as I really don't need the "blogger world" to know because I'm unbelievably embarassed, I weigh more now than I ever have and I weigh more than I ever did while I was pregnant with Kara.

My thyroid (lack of one) may have something to do with it, but I'm sick and tired of using that as an excuse every damn time. Yes, I am on the highest dose I have EVER been and the doctors did tell me that after Kara my dose would lower, but it has only gone up...I've researched and researched, but it may come down to another opinion...possibly closer to home...but first...here's the new 09 plan.

• we WILL be utilizing our YMCA membership...even the daycare ladies said...we didn't think you would come back when we went tonight. I have started Water Aerobics Mon, Tues and Thurs nights and the kids do swim lessons on Wednesday nights!!
• I will be cooking more, eating out less...yes Mom, you think this is impossible, but convienence is the story of our life.
• I will be cooking with more whole grains, which means switching the kids to wheat bread, which yes, makes Brandon not too happy, but the 2 little ones, don't have a clue. Tim...whole other story...if he's hungry enough...he'll eat right?
• attending church as a family! Which again, may prove impossible after this weekend. Many of you are probably thinking...Tyler...nope my Tyler with a vagina...KARA....Holy Monster.
• and last but certainly not least...ME...Tim and I have agreed to give me one night alone, even if it is going to aerobics without taking all 3 kids to drop off...I get to go alone. He will make his class nights his alone nights, which gives me my nights!

There are many more, but it's more of a let's do this as a family year. I am so glad to have all 3 kids healthy and getting them involved in the community. This year, I want to be more active as a family. But until May, it will be hard, but we will be doing it as best as we can for now!

On another note, until I sign off for tonight, I just have to tell you that the first night of Water Aerobics went great....but I am extremely sore and irratible because I'm exhausted...when I told Tim I was going back tomorrow, he giggled and said...I love you hunny! Just remember I will help you and encourage you!

We're 3

Tyler made it, he's 3, and as we speak he is currently giving me quite the attitude, but I admit, it's probably the over tired, sick of people, presents and pizza attitude.

In a week we've been crazy busy. Last weekend, we had Grandma's 51st birthday, Kara made a cake (ok...Walmart did, Kara "picked it out") I made dinner for Mom we spent the night and then came home the next day. Then came Christmas Eve, I worked all day then we packed up and went to my Uncle Mark and Aunt Deb's house in Tylerville, stayed there most of the night, I ended up reliving old times and drove my drunken parents home while Tim, Kara and Brandon followed behind. When we got home Grandpa convinced Brandon that Santa loves Genny Light, so needless to say, Santa and his reindeer enjoyed Cookies, Milk and a whole can of Genny Light and Santa even left a note thanking Brandon for the great tasting beer!! We got up the next morning and went to Church with my step-brother and sister, Kara wasn't ready to get up for the day so during church she konked out! After church Mom and Dad watched the kids while Tim and I went to meet Heidi half way to get Tyler. He was so excited to see us, it had been 6 days since he had been home. We came back to Grammie and Grampies house and ate, and opened presents with Tiff, Tyler, Great Grampie, Grampie and Grammie. Great Grammie showed up later we got so much. Around 4:30 we all headed home, all 3 kids slept on the way home, thanks to all the fresh air they got playing outside! We unloaded, finished up some last minute (stocking) Santa stuff and woke the kids up to come inside...we all crashed after opening out gifts.

Friday was our Christmas with our "besties" Uncle Joe Joe, Aunt "May Beff", Olivia, Patrick and Courtney came over to open presents with us. After that it was nap time for all of us.

Saturday was Lyndaker Christmas back in Croghan, loaded the van and up we went for the day. The boys had a great time playing with all their cousins and we ate way too much.

Sunday--oh...Sunday...Mommy had the bright idea Saturday night to take the kids to Chuck E. Cheese...DUH MOMMY WHAT WERE U THINKING?????? We got up around 9 on Sunday and Tim and I contemplated we asked the Bova's to go with us...yeah they were smart and said they were busy. So we all got ready, packed the kids up and told them we were going for a ride. Ty and Kara were asleep before we got to Adams and Brandon by the time we got to Mexico, they woke right beofre we got there. Holy freakin busy...DUH Gabe, it was a weekend!! We stayed for a while and then went to the Mall to get Tyler his birthday presents. Ate dinner at Denny's (I was craving pancakes) and then came home and crashed.

...And here we are...Tyler's 3rd Birthday it's now 8:30, my house is finally back to "normal" and I'm getting a chance to finally upload pictures. I worked all day and I got the funniest phone call at work...all I heard was "MOM, I GOT DOLLARS" My Grandma Carolyn sent "Master" Tyler 2 dollars, he was so stinking excited...my dollars mommy, my dollars.

Here are a couple pics from our busy week!!! Love to All

Stay tuned, I'm sure my next post will be KARA'S 1ST BIRTHDAY...sniff sniff.

Things are starting to settle down

BUT SOMETIMES I LIE....So, Sunday after Turkey Day we picked up kids from Heidi's and headed off to go bowling (of course after nap time) and surprisingly Tyler did well, he didn't spazz like crazy when we got there, he sat still for me to change his shoes, we picked out a ball together, he carried it to the lanes, went to go through it for practice and BOOOOOMMMM down he goes, 8lb ball on top of finger. I chase the finger while Tyler runs to daddy, whining, yes just whining my finger, my finger. I gather ball up, look at Tim, Tim is white and mouths, "he needs F*%King stiches, much to my astonishment, I replied...what, you are totally over reacting, he takes his hand off Tyler's finger and it starts GUSHING Blood, Tim ran to the desk and said, I need a first aide kit...NOW, luckily, I stayed calm...yeah...me...weird huh. I gave Tim a couple "Seriously, Stop freaking out looks", I grabbed hat, mittens, boots, gave Brandon $20 and told the people we came with to have fun with Brandon and we will pick him up later, Tyler needs stiches. Ran to the car, with bowling shoes still in tact, packed up kids, made a couple phone calls, dropped Kara to my bestest friends house and headed for the ER...yup...packed...luckily Daddy-O pulled some strings (the joys of his job) and we were back in Minor Treatment in no time...no crying, no nothing...amazing for my almost diagnosed Autistic boy. (keep reading, the calm before the storm) We get back there and the nurse beings to examine him as he tells her his "finner" hurt, she begins to take the bandage off much to my surprise SCREAMING BEGINS...MOMMY MOMMY MOMMY NO NO NO MOMMY, yup wrapped back up, and we are sent for an x-ray...x-ray complete broke in 2 places, time for stiches, I will spare you the screaming hysterical detail, it was just bad, we will leave it at that!!!!! After we "all done" he was telling everyone about his "finner" and he broke it with big balls (lol...my kid) and it hurts bad...he told all the nurses thank you and bye friends...thanks to the great Tylenol with Codeine he was quite talkative to everyone!!! I am now convinced that my little boy does not need speech services at school anymore...GET OFF OF ME AND I WANNA GO HOME RIGHT NOW, came out quite clear in the ER. So here we are 8 days later, splinted, wrapped, and still broken, Tyler is now deathly afraid of his 10 month old sister, who thinks his finger is something to play with and take away from him, she will sneak up to him while he is watching TV and YANK it off, to the response of him screaming and her laughing (i love my little girl) so whenever she looks at him and smiles, he screams because he's scared. Stiches come out Thursday, and God only knows how long before it's completely healed, he's gonna have one heck of a scar because of where it's placed it was very hard to stich.

So....Monday night 9:30, my night consisted of...gormet meal for my family...hot dogs and mac cheese...oh yeah..carbs...then a trip to Urgent Care with the above named CHILD. I came home and the little shit had green stuff oozing from his eye, I looked at Tim and said...yeah, thanks for saving that for me...we ate, Brandon and Kara went to one of my co-workers house while Tyler and I went to Urgant Care where he proceeded to tell everyone there my finner broken...the PA took one look and said, yup PINK EYE...no daycare, no school and wash his hands. Ok...Tim is working nights all week and Ty has school tomorrow, I am busy at work...yeah...ok....so it took a lot of energy to make the decision that he needs to go to MOMMY HEIDI'S HOUSE because we have no where else to take him, I would normally stay home with him until Tim gets home at 8:30, but I'm so busy to where an HOUR is precious time at work...A WHOLE OTHER BLOG...THANK YOU GEORGE BUSH AND OUR ECONOMY....so he is off to his mothers, Brandon is asleep on the couch with the game controller in his hand and I am feeling myself ready for beddy bye...after praying I don't get the dreaded PINK EYE...y do they call it pink when his eye was oozing GREEN....people and their colors!

****PLEASE SAY A PRAYER FOR MY FRIEND SARAH AND HER FAMILY AS THEY ARE DEALING WITH HER FATHER'S ILLNESS SO CLOSE TO CHRISTMAS****

SARAH, YOU ARE IN MY THOUGHTS AND PRAYERS EVERYDAY...PLEASE CALL IF YOU NEED ANYTHING!

This Year...

Thanksgiving is a new meaning in so many ways. This year, not really unlike years previous, I have my daughter and husband to celebrate with. I am looking so forward to getting up in the morning with my husband and children (Brandon and Kara) and going to church to give thanks for everything we have. You know, I may not have millions, or make lots of money and love my job and life may not be perfectly perfect, but somedays I reflect on what I do have...really...I do have alot...alot more than many people around this world.

To start with I have FAMILY--my family is and always will be number ONE! I would give anything to have them with me my whole life. I have my husband whom which I can call my husband officially this Thanksgiving, my 2 step-sons whom step means nothing to me, they are and always will be my sons. My sweet precious daughter, whom God gave me after a lot of prayer and high hopes. I want so much for her and I will try my hardest to know that she will achieve all she wants in life.

I have FRIENDS--lately without family a mile away, I/We have the BESTEST friends anyone could ask for. Tim and I have found friends that we want in our lives, we want to do things as familes and we want our children, whom are close in age to grow up being best friends. I am so thankful that they are always a phone call away.

I have HEALTH--it may not be the greatest and I may not be a supermodel but I have decent health, nothing drastic (that medicine can't fix) is wrong and all my children are healthy.

and lastly, and second most importantly...I have FAITH IN GOD...recently that faith was tested in so many ways, and I learned and shared with my best friend that he really does listen and prayer really does work. That I should have known when I was able to concieve Kara but I doubted, which I know should have never happened, but I know that someone up there is watching out for me and my family and whomever, is a prayer away!

I really could go on and on but tonight, as the boys are gone getting our favorite ice cream and we get ready to settle down and watch a movie as a family, I will reflect on the past year and all I have to be thankful for and all that I will gain in the year to come.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING EVERYONE--GOD BLESS YOU ALL

God won't give you more...(A LONG ONE)

...than you can handle...right? I'm sure that's the saying and honestly I truly believe that it is true, but I have to say right now I feel so defeated by God, and just everyone. (No offense to anyone, but I am having a horrible November.)

Because I feel so much like a single mother and have no one, it seems I vent to this blog, trying to get more active, I think for a type of therapy, I need it. Thanks to my mother, who honestly, (i just noticed that I am using this word alot) knows me better than I know myself, always knows when somethings up! I get a card from her today and it just for once today, made me smile.

I often joke about being a single mother, but as I look around this house...yup...I'm single. As much as I can go on and on about the Army, I have to say that I know what they go through, in a way. Tim has started doing his clinicals for school, his last year, and with his work schedule and my schedule, I sat down before I started typing and I saw my husband 6.75 hours all week as of 7p.m. tonight...really...thats bad. I laugh about our schedule, and think it's crazy, so I want to share this past week with you:

• Monday (Heidi didn't take Tyler SURPRISE!!)--Kids to sitter, Tim to clinicals 7-4, Gabe to work 7:30-4, get kids at sitter, home at 4:20 and make dinner (I have 40 mins to prepare, set and eat), Tim goes to school at 5...pick up from dinner, dishes, pack Tim's lunch, help Brandon with homework, 2 younger kids bathed, jammies, relax time before bed (Dora or Diego) and kara bottle, BED...Tim comes home at 9:30 to find me sleeping on the couch, he wakes me and we go to bed, maybe minimal chit chat (see post below for what happened Monday)
• Tuesday--All kids to sitter with play clothes in hand, NO SCHOOL (extra pay for sitter for extra kid) Tim work 24 hours, Gabe work 7:30-4, get kids from sitter, actually made meatloaf for dinner for the kids and I, made soup for Wednesday dinner, cleaned up kitchen, helped B with homework, down time, talk to Daddy, bed for kids, laundry for me, and bed at 10:30-11:00, not before calling the cops on the neighbors dog who has been barking since 4:17.
• Wednesday--All kids up and out the door by 6:45 to sitter, work from 7:30-4, Tim gets out of work at 9, ran errands for me, never stopped to see me :-( clinicals from 9ish to 4, get kids, Tim heats up soup, eats soup, Tim leaves for school at 5, clean up kitchen, do dishes, grocery night (I'll have you know, I will be changing grocery night until Thursday)homework with Brandon, baths, relax time, Daddy actually comes home at 8:00, kids are in bed, kara is asleep on my chest, I'm dozing on couch, we go to bed.
• Thursday--Tim gets to sleep in! I get up and look out the window to find light on across the road at abandoned house, I freak out, Tim's awake, calls the cops, meanwhile Kara wakes up and is up for good, out of the house to get bloodwork done by 6a.m. Bloodwork done and in work by 6:30, meeting at 8, meeting at 9:30, deadlines to meet. Doctors appt at 3:15, Kids went to Heidi's Tim and Kara met me at doctors, there until 5p.m was going to have dinner with my husband when he decided he better get to Guilfoyle and be a student! I came home for an hour and then went to get the boys, back here regroup from their mothers, jammies and bed, Kara to bed, pack Tim's lunch, Brandon's lunch, get stuff around for Friday morning, Tim home at 11p.m to find me asleep in bed, wakes me up to kiss me, back to sleep I go.
• Friday--all kids to sitter, Tim to work 24, Gabe to work 7:30 to 4, drop kids of to Fiona's to find Kara's paci no where, told her she should be ok, but if she needed it call me and I would run home, called Tim to tell him and to see if maybe he could stop to get it on his way to Drum, gave me a run around, I ended up turning around and drive back to get it, run upstairs find it on our bed took it back to sitters, back on the road, meet Tim on road, flip Tim off and travel to work, hit every red light, get to Dunkin Donuts, decide that I'm already exhausted better go for the Latte with a double shot!!! get to work, deadlines deadlines deadlines...sick...sick...sick...cough...cough...cough...pee pee pee....called the doctor and the doctor said...you may have pneumonia, we will call you in an antibiotic call us if you aren't better by Monday. To Kinney's to get drugs, back to Fiona's to get kids, we are all home, oh yeah...dinner...scrambled eggs it is, Tyler wants cereal...4 bowls of cereal, hes a growing boy!!! After dinner, dishes, baths...here comes the best part, because I'm sure I've bored you...Everything is going hunky dory in the tubby, kids are playing, kara is out and dressed and it is just too quiet...Brandon comes to empty garbages and says TYLER (about the same TYLER as I heard Monday night) I asked what he did and he said, I see a little turd on the bottom, I freak out...yell at him only to find him to stand up and there is a MOUND of it on the bottom of the tub...I lost it...no lost it...2 times in one week...I lost it...so here I am, Kara's screaming in her crib being contained I'm screaming at Tyler while I scrub the toilet with bleach and water...coughing and screaming...get Tyler dressed, put him in the corner until he can say sorry, clean downstairs, Kara laundry night, and here I am...typing, as the kids are "relaxing"

Tonight is usually the night I go hang out with my best friend and the kids play, but she is so busy she doesn't have time either, and I really, until tonight didn't realize how much I enjoy that, yes, it's chaotic, but it really gives me time to just get out and watch the kids play with other kids and for once they aren't asking me for everything.

I've realized this past week that our family (Me and the kids) need something that every week we can look forward too. So after much research and determination I have decided to join the YMCA, it is really cheap when I go through work we get a 20% discount and they take it right out of my paycheck every bi-week, so it's not another bill I have to worry about paying. I'm so excited, there is no excuse anymore to work on ME. They have daycare there, they have activities for Brandon and he can start getting involved in sports and all that jazz. They have a pool where the kids can swim year round, I'm excited, I just have to wait till I can go (without kids) and sign up. Hopefully I can sneak away tomorrow to do all the paperwork.

Well my laundry just finished and even though it's Friday and only 7:30, it's relax time and I'm ready for relax time as well, but not as excited as I am for bed time! Thanks for listening and sorry to bore you with my problems!

Potty Training = Not Good News

Well, now that I've calmed down and am no longer "psycho mommy" I have decided to share my thoughts with people who I can't see nor hear laughing.

Tonight, I was doing my wifely duties, you know the laundry, cut Brandon's hair, sweep/mop the floor, dishes, counters, packing Tim's lunch for work tomorrow, my lunch, watching Kara...etc, you get the picture (did I mention Tim's at school?)

Well our lovely baby monitors are so sensitve (thank you to whomever got me that gift) I heard the boys arguing in the bathroom, now picture Brandon, just getting his hair cut and taking a shower to clean himself of the hair, when his 2 1/2 year old brother decides he wants to brush his teeth, which I may add he's obsessed with, well in the misdt of this potty training shit, Tyler decides he needs to go potty all by himself, but really Brandon is in there so he decides to watch this circus and not yell to me....please read on...

I'm in the kitchen when I hear...TYLER REID...SLAM...door shuts...so I run to the bottom of the stairs to hear Brandon gasping and saying OMG (oh my God) I ask what happens...no response...I hear Brandon say....Tyler go get Mom...by then I'm half way up the stairs on a mad dash to open the door and see Tyler bare assed with a stench I knew was his "POOP" I looked on the floor to which I saw turds...yes turds...feces, poop, turdes and it smeared on the toilet seat and all over his hands. I gasped and turned and (People please don't turn me in to Social Services) spanked his bare ass and sat him in the hall, much to my surprise when he got up to see more TURDS on my hallway floor...did I mention the wet roll (brand new roll) of toilet paper that he decided to dunk in the toilet and try to clean it up himself...god bless him...sooooo after yelling and screaming at both boys...Brandon for not getting me sooner, and he can't tell me he didn't see him because we have glass shower doors, he stood there and laughed.....both boys are to bed at 7:30 and Mommy is now laughing because really it's funny, but after the voicemail and text messages I left Tim, I won't be laughing when I see his face when he is brave enough to come back from school.

I only pray potty training gets better :-(