And All I Hear Is...

...the washing machine! Wow...I can't believe it's been 3 weeks since I gave birth to this amazing, laid back, loved baby girl. As I sit here amazed that my house is quiet and all the kids are sleeping I just thank God that he gave me such wonderful children to call mine.

I'm not going to lie, it's is down right chaotic in this house at times and especially when I have my hands tied feeding the baby and Kara is beating up Tyler because she wants the toy, she didn't even know we had until he picked it up, from her brother and then it starts, bottle removed, baby down, baby cries, mommy takes the toy from Tyler and Kara and they both cry, yup...3 crying all at once! What do I do? Laugh! Really, because that's all I can do, I can't cry anymore, this is life and I'm going to make the best of it.

I finally ventured out with all 3 little ones alone yesterday for the first time. I have to tell you that I am so proud of myself I couldn't hardly stand it. We all got up, got dressed and headed out to see Daddy at work in Alex Bay, of course we didn't eat breakfast before we left but I was so impressed with my kids we got "no no's" (donuts) on the way to see Tim. They did really good at Tim's work and really well on the way home, even though I bribed them both with french fries so they would stay awake...I went 1 for 2! Then when Brandon got home I ventured to the Mall with all 4 by myself (I needed a new cell, mine pooped the bed), only minor breakdowns there but I think I only yelled at kids 2 times yesterday...one a piece! I had patience and was calm all day...it was great!

Kara and Tyler smother Alexa with kisses everyday and they can't get enough of her. Tim's partner yesterday at work told Tyler and Kara that she was going to keep Lexi at the station while they went home to take a nap, that did not go over well at all...Kara told her "down" and pointed to the car seat and Tyler started to cry and tried to take Lexi from Christine. It was quite funny, we are so glad that they aren't sitting on her and putting blankets over her head! I've told her that she has to be tough because the two of them aren't going to let her be anything else!

I will be going back to work (YIPPEE) October 19th and we have found the most wonderful babysitter for the girls that I could ever tell you. This lady is a stay at home mother and wife and watches another baby whos mother works for JRC also but only has him in the evenings, we went to meet her and fell completely in love and we are so blessed to call her our sitter!

Meanwhile...Alexa has started to fuss and is hungry!! Ta-ta for now!

Pleased to Announce the Birth of...

ALEXA LOU THOMAS

SEPTEMBER 4TH, 2009

8LBS 10OZ

19 3/4 IN LONG

12:25A.M

Alexa came into the world and our lives haven't been the same since. I admit I wanted her out because I was sick and tired of being pregnant and felt like "crap" the last couple weeks, but now that she's out and we are finally adjusted I can admit, I wanted her back "in" for the first couple days. It has only been 19 months since we've did the "newborn" thing but it was extremely hard getting back into the swing. It didn't help matters that we now have a full house and had to adjust lives of children to the new baby as well.

Alexa is 10 days old today and shes a bundle of joy. All my fears of her older sister sitting on her and thinking she's a dolly are completely nothing what I expected. I sit here in tears and can tell you that Kara is the most amazing person with Alexa than I could ever imagine. She is beyond words amazing with her. If she is out of her sight she will run around the house looking for "lala" Lala has become her nickname as Lulu is Kara's so we have "lala and lulu" in our house. Kara smothers her with kisses at every chance she can get and says "nice" and rubs her head gently.

Alexa's birth was nothing what I expected being 28 hours long from start to finish. I had an ultrasound on Monday the 1st and they anticipated the baby being 8lbs give or take 10% so on Tuesday the 2nd I went into the doctor hoping to hear good news about a possible induction. I was 37 weeks along and was ready to have this baby. He examined me and asked why are you undressed I usually don't check patients until they are at least 38 weeks. I said "I feel funny, can you just do it" along with a pouty lip. He laughed and said I sure can. He checked me, sat up, and smiled and said "your a good 3cm dialated" Start walking and I'll see you next week if not before and he winked! I left there feeling good thinking I would soon have a baby in my arms!!! I came home Tuesday and cleaned like a mad woman and actually mowed the lawn, contracting all the way!! Wedesday came and I cleaned again, got last minute things done. I took Brandon school shopping and contracted like crazy into Kohl's came home, took a nap with the kids, and we went to Brandon's open house at school and went to Pizza Hut for dinner. While at dinner they got intensely worse, but I kept it to myself and didn't tell Tim. I had to return some things at Kohl's so I went in alone and exchanged some things while Tim sat with the kids. I came out and he took one look at me and said "you're in labor aren't you" I started crying and said I'm pretty sure I can't walk anymore at all. We rushed out to a friends house we were house sitting and fed their fish and quickly dropped kids off at 2 different places. Went to the hospital where they hooked me up to see the contractions and said I was 4-5. I started walking the halls when around 1030 my doctor came in and checked me again and said your a good 5cm, we are going to admit you, keep walking through the night and I will be up in the morning to see you. Well miscommunication led me to bed all night and no walking. I got up the next morning, showered and started walking. He came in around 8 to check me and I was at 6...he said I'll be in at lunch time to break your water until then keep walking or get your epidural. Well I walked and walked and walked and he never came in until 7p.m to break my water. I had gotten the epidural around 5ish because the contractions where coming right along. After he broke my water, and turned on pitocin my epidural completely wore off and there was no time for another one, I was pushing my med button like crazy but was feeling every ache and pain and piggy back contraction for 5 hours. At 1130 I was 9 and i started to panic I was scared and going nuts. Right before midnight the nurse came in and checked me again because I was going fast at that point and said "hunny, you're fully dialated but the screaming girl across the hall is fully as well and she starting to crown so keep breathing through your contractions until Dr. Dodard can get back over here to deliver you" I looked at her and I'm telling you right now that if looks could kill that poor woman would have been dead, my response to her was "tell that lady to hurry the hell up then" Right after midnight they came in and I started pushing. This was nothing like Kara's delivery at all. I remember him telling me push, push, push, ok her head is out here come the shoulders...yadda yadda, this birth was push, push, push, here's your baby. She came out so fast I didn't know what hit me. I couldn't believe that I had did it. We were very surpirsed of her weight and joked with the doctor and said "you told me she wasn't ready" If I had gone to 40 weeks I'm pretty sure my delivery story wouldn' t have been anything like this as I'm pretty sure she would have been over 10lbs.

Alexa is healthy and doing well along with everyone else in this household. I'm still debating going back to work because I can't find daycare and won't leave a newborn with just anyone. I want/need a mother/grandmother type person I can trust and they are extrememly hard to come by. Any suggestions please let me know!

God bless all xx00

so...um...yeah

Had the doctors appointment today...and now panic and nervousness has set it. He measured me and looked at me like...I had 4 heads. I'm 34 weeks and 4 days and I'm measuring 38 weeks 1 day. I have gained 13 pounds in 2 weeks, with that being the only weight gain this whole pregnancy, he just looked in disbelief and joked around with me for the most part. He said if I haven't gone in 2 weeks, he will see me back at the office and possibly order an ultrasound to see how big the baby is, if the baby is big the thought of induction is a possiblity. I don't want to be induced but if I can easier plan where the children will be than it will be better. Brandon left today to spend the night with Tim's father who's home from Florida and I told him that I will most likely have this baby while he's at his mothers the next 2 weeks, he wasn't impressed! In a way, I'm hoping that could be better because that's 2 kids I don't have to worry about where they are going...now my other fear is that I will go Labor Day weekend and my mother will be at camp with no cell service and miss the birth!!!! Hopefully she will be here soon!!!

48 days to go

...but really whos counting! I subscribed to babycenter.com and every week on my "weekly time" i get updates on what the baby looks like, what I should expect, etc. I saw on Saturday that there were not many days left and I kind of freaked. It surely is going by fast.

Summer is starting to wind down and I start thinking about school clothes and things for school. I have yet to find a babysitter, so we will even see if I get to go back to work/school. I'm looking for someone actively, but like my search for Fiona, i need to have full trust in this person. Especially now, with a newborn.

Things are coming together for baby Alexa, we are heading to Syracuse tomorrow and possibly picking up her carseat, yes we have 2...technically 3, but just as Kara got a new one, I think it's only fair for Alexa to have her own. I need to get the bassanet from my moms and we shall be ready, a few arrangements in the livingroom to accomadate her things, but no big deal. We set the baby swing up today and just to my prediction, Kara was sitting in it before we could get things picked up. She is getting ready, she's constantly pulling up my shirt saying baby and sticking her finger in my belly button (which is almost closed!!!!) I'm really surprised I'm not packed yet, as I was with Kara at this time. That reminds me, I'm still looking for a diaper bag as well, I'm anal about "bags" Kara has graduated from a "diaper bag" to a bag she shares with Tyler with "stuff" in it for when we go out! This shall be interesting with 4 kids and 2 bags, I'm nervous, scared, and excited all in one!

We are heading to the Syracuse Zoo tomorrow with our friends and there 4 kids, yup thats right, 4 adults and 7 children, it's always an adventure when we all get together.

The boys spent 2 weeks with their mother...a whole other story, that would take me all night to blog about...long story short, Tyler came home with a bald head and a diagnoses of Chicken Pox, which are really flee bites from her 5 dogs...we are anxious to see if his Chicken Pox come back when they go back the last 2 weeks in August...Court ordered visitation, not our choice.

We are all doing well, just hanging out and anxiously awaiting the arrival of this baby!

Hiccups OH MY

I have to admit, even with the extra weight I never felt as much movement with Kara as I do with Alexa. This girl doesn't ever sleep, I'm hoping its a sign that when she comes out she will sleep alot to make up for it. The boys watch in amazement how my stomach moves all around from one side to another. Today, we went to pizza hut for lunch/dinner and Tim sat the kids down while I went to the bathroom and I come back to find them sitting at a booth I sat down and could barely fit, really the whole meal she was pushing against the table and all I could do was laugh. We really are at the point where when she pushes I can see a lump (maybe a hand or foot or quite possibly her head?) it's crazy, even with all the fat!

The hiccups are out of control, last night at midnight I was almost in tears because I couldn't fall asleep because the hiccups were every 2 seconds, even though it was annoying, Tim and I got a huge laugh about it.

10 weeks and counting, 70 days, we haven't really even started thinking about getting anything ready. This time with Kara I was ready and had already picked out her coming home outfit and rearraged her room 2 times. I guess it is true when they say things change with your 2nd. I have made a list of things we need and things I want per say. I'm hoping to get into Kara's clothes (most still with tags on or even worn once) next week!

xxoo

What to do?

So, its been almost 3 weeks since the start of my summer vacation with the kids. Tim is busy working overtime which is perfectly fine, but here I am with the kids. The last couple days have been nothing but utter mayham. I yell at the kids from the time they get out of bed until the time I fight with them to go to bed, I'm thinking my kids are the only kids in the city that have a summer bed time of 8p.m. Today I'm pondering on what to do. We have a beautiful pool, yes, but its hard to get a 3 1/2 year old who doesn't really know if he wants in, an overactive 17 month old who would just jump in if we let her but then once shes in, she wants out! And a fish of a 10 year old who really isn't any help unless hounded. So, our only pool time usually happens when the kids are napping.

Today I have been looking around the websites of watertown wondering what we could do today and tomorrow. Today may be still a little chilly for the park for a picnic, so maybe that could be tomorrow, I contemplated the Sci-Tech Center or the zoo, both of which I don't really like, but would suffer through for the kids. Honestly, I've never been to the Sci-Tech Center either has Tim so a part of me wants to wait and go as a family, but a part of me wants to get the kids out of the house to do something. Yesterday we went to the library, and I think when people saw me pushing a double stroller with two toddlers in it, they went running the other way! The kids were good for the first 30 minutes while looking at the books they picked out (Mickey Mouse and Thomas The Train) then when Mommy wanted to look for books, they decided to pull as many books off the shelf as they could and throw them on the floor which Brandon was nice enough to pick up for me, but felt the need to yell at them, loudly, everytime they threw it on the ground, causing attention to us!

Hopefully something will come to mind. Swimming lessons are still an option for Brandon for the summer, but sadly they start Monday and they are everyday, and the last 2 weeks hes at his mothers and we all know shes not going to bring him in everyday!

Aches and Pains and Recliners, OH MY

it's started...literally a pain in my ass! This baby is way more active than Kara ever was. I can be doing something when all of a sudden a jolt hits me like a ton of bricks, it scares me. I've gotten to the point where I dread going to bed, in fact I cried when we went upstairs to bed last night because I can't sleep, I can't get comfortable in bed and when I do I have to roll over or get up to pee. My siatic nerve is pinched to the point it crams up on me and I can't move. The other night while Tim was working I actually came downstairs and slept in the recliner, even though I got up 3 times during the night to pee and check on the kids upstairs, I slept, but really don't want to make it a habit.

I don't know if it's because I'm on vacation and I'm trying to stay busy, but I have cleaned (including dusting, moping and vacuuming) the downstairs of this house completely. I am caught up on my laundry everyday and before I go to bed, there are no dishes in the sink and no toys on the floor. My bed gets made everyday, as do the kids, and sometimes I find myself looking for stuff to do, I actually was going to get on a ladder and wash my windows but thought twice about that. I'm pretty sure my husband doesn't want to be at work and get called to my house to pick up my butt off the ground.

Hope everyone has a safe and happy 4th.

2 weeks already

After my monthly visit to the OB doctor I was informed I have hit the official "see me in 2 weeks mark" I looked at him and he said..."something I said" I said "well, I just can't believe I'm already coming every 2 weeks, I think with Kara I was done and ready for her to come, I haven't even started getting things ready"

Everything is looking good with Baby "Lexi" as the kids call her. Now that I'm on vacation all summer, it is time to get going on all the "jazz". I had my 1 hour glucose sugar test yesterday, took both little kids with me, what a mistake that was...We have been letting Brandon stay home alone for small amounts of time, so he didn't want to go yesterday so he got to stay home...yup, I'm sure all the people who saw me, with an active 3 year old, a crazy/naughty 1 year old and my ginormous stomach were wondering what I often wonder "what the heck is she thinking" Tyler, I do have to admit, did "ok"...yes, just ok. He understands, but on the other hand so does Kara she just doesn't want to listen. Tyler also had to get an xray of his belly, boy was that an adventure. It ended in tears flowing down my face, sweating, kara screaming and 3 people to hold him down while I watched and pushed a button when they said "PUSH"...not an interesting experiance to say the least!

Today, we are packing the kids up to go to Fort Drum for the Mountain Fest Air Show...we went last year, I wasn't too "keen" on the idea last year but once I got there I saw the excitement on the kids faces and realized why they like it so much, so this year I am actually excited about going, Kara will be more fun this year, I just hope it doesn't bother her ears.

Time to get my chores done so I don't feel guilty about going! Have a good weekend all!

Father's Day

Father's Day...has so many meanings. The morning was the usual Sunday routine, with Kara coming in bed with us, making us laugh and waking us up, but today, went to the cards and the hugs and the kisses.

I'm so grateful to have a wonderful father for my kids, he is so great with them, I only wish that my "donor" was this involved in my life. The more I think about it though, I don't need the "donor" I have the greatest step-father anyone could ask for and that's all I ever need.

Happy Father's Day to all fathers weather you are donors or have stepped up and are REAL fathers.

As Always

Kara enjoying the water on Spring Break
My baby and I on Vacation

Brandon and I at dinner

looking so sweet and innocent

Kara and her cousin Savannah on Easter Sunday.

As always it has been a while! I guess no news is good news, but with the busy life of 3 children I don't find time to get on the computer as much, honestly my online time is spent when Tim is driving and I'm online on my Blackjack! I'll try to update us all "quickly"

Tim--is officially a graduate, we are patiently waiting for him to finish up one last clinical tomorrow with Dr. Delaney in the ER and he will be taking his state exam in Rochester on June 18th (a special day for me, so I have no doubts that things will be fine for him). We received paperwork today in the mail and he is "good to go" with testing. Other than that he really doesn't have a life so there is not much to report.

Brandon--as of today with 14 days of school left Brandon has perfect attendance and is wicked proud and happy that he will be receiving a free yearbook this year (simple things...we love it) for having perfect attendance. He has had it 2 years in a row and is pretty proud of himself. About a month ago when all the kids were sick, Brandon, who is never sick, got a bad sinus infection, he dragged himself to school and said "Mom, I can't ruin it now, pick me up in 3 hours please..." He made it through the day, but we went to the doctor after! This, for Brandon is a huge change for when he was living with his biological mother he was missing on average 38 to 40 days of school a year! He is signed up for swimming lessons for the summer and is excited to get in our pool, he wants to beat Grampie for the first one to swim!

Tyler--""Sigh"" oh Tyler, I will continue to say this and dread for the next two that I believe that age 3 is worse than the terrible 2's. We have regressed in potty training and he currently wants nothing to do with it! He used to throw a fit when we would put diapers on him, now, he doesn't care, he won't pee on the potty (except for school) and will throw a down-right fit when we try to put him on. We haven't given up, we are just researching different approaches for Tyler. As far as regressing goes, he is also have a hard time lately with what I say "life in general" He seems to be "lost" that's the only way I can put it. He whines alot, he cries for no reason, screams and throws tantrums, it doesn't matter where we are. He can get spanked by either Tim or I and it doesn't seem to phase him. They have started seeing the behavior in school and have approached me on it. While having a conference with his Special Ed teacher the other day she mentioned the word "Bi-polar" and I almost lost it in tears. His teacher had no idea that his mother is severely bi-polar and has to be medicated because of it. Knowing it is hereditary, I immediately called the pediatrician for a referral to a child psychologist. I may be jumping the gun, but I need to get this under control in the next 3 months, because having another child with Tyler still acting this way will be extremely hard. I would love to go into length on what else Tyler does but I really would be typing until bedtime. For Tim to recognize it and actually come to me with concern means that we need to get to the bottom of it. It's extremely hard to deal with him at this age, with him not able to tell us what he saw while living at his mothers because he was so young and was subjected to alot while the older kids were shipped off. It's starting to show in more ways than one.

Kara--A person once told me that girls were harder to raise than boys and I laughed and said that is completely impossible because I am a girl, how hard can it be. I'm going to tell you this, Miss Kara is simply amazing. I'm not one to brag about my children, but then again, it's my blog and I'll do what I want...hehe...Kara amazes us everyday. Tim calls her "my clone" and I'm starting to believe him. Today I called her "mommy's little bitch" because honestly I can't come up with any other word for her attitude and personality. Growing up as the only child I was very friendly with people because I had no one other than my mother in the house to talk to. My mom often tells the story of my first plane ride and trip to Disney World. She read me books on how NOT to talk to strangers and the first stranger I saw, I talked to. Kara is completely the same. She will talk to anyone who will look at her, in fact, even if you don't look at her she will say HI to you until you say HI back. She is very independant, will do what you ask of her, this morning she was hungry so while I was cooking breakfast she went over to her chair and pounded on the seat until someone lifted her up. She constantly beats on Tyler and makes him cry and will not STOP until he cries. Her favorite words are No and Nahhh, everything...EVERYTHING is NO with a shake of the head. She gives the best hugs and kisses that I have ever had and she makes me melt every single day. She's almost too good that I'm worried about how this one will be. My expectations are that she will act the same as Kara but I'm worried that she will give me a run for my money. OH YEAH, DID I MENTION THAT I WAS HAVING A GIRL? We recently had to change babysitters last minute (long story) and we are waiting for our sitter to become state certified...Kara now cries every day when I have to leave her, and it breaks my heart, but it makes picking her up the best part of my day! She is my miracle and I'm absolutely in love with her.

Me--I am doing wonderful. I have the best family I could ask for and this pregnancy is going faster than I would like it to, but on the other hand, I'm ready to NOT be pregnant. I am enjoying all the movements and kicks, but I don't miss the tossing and turning and aches and pains. I don't remember being this uncomfortable with Kara so soon, but maybe I just forgot. I'm starting to "panic" about how things will go down when I go into the hospital (I've 25 weeks today...you are all thinking get a life right?) When I had Kara it was only Brandon living here so he was easy to just leave, now we have 3 to worry about where they are going and who will be taking them. Work is going well, I'm also ready to have the summer off and excited to spend time with the kids before this baby is born.

That's all that really has been going on with our life. Same ol' Same ol'...we are excited for all the fun summer stuff that will be happening on the weekends. Our weekends seemed to be booked for all of June and most of July! Also in July we will be having Grandma and Grandpa Salnorris coming from Florida (Tim's mom and step-dad) This will be the first time they have seen Kara and the first time since Tyler was a newborn. We are looking forward to it.

And finally, after asking Tim to make it public we have come up with a name for this baby and Tim has made me promise that I won't change it because he really likes it. Kara's baby sister's name will be:

ALEXA LOU THOMAS

Hope all is well with everyone and we hope everyone has a safe and healthy summer! xxoo from our family to yours!

Miss Vocab Herself

First of all, I will as always apologize for not updating sooner, but if you lived in this household, the only free time I get is when I sit on the toilet and usually that isn't always alone either.

I have an amazing, intelligent 14 month old who is beyond a doubt the littliest SHIT there is. Currently I am yelling at her every 15 minutes (most times less) for hitting, pinching or tormentering her 3 year old brother who cries because she is hurting him. She looks at me and laughs and that just makes Tyler cry harder while inside I am snickering. I used to get so frustrated at Tyler when he was her age (I was pregnant also) and say "Kara will NOT act this way" Tim would respond with "Nope, I'm betting she's worse" I always ignored his comment but just the other day I looked at him laughing and crying all in the same sentance and said "Damnit, you were right and I hate you for it" I spent all last week on vacation, yelling at my DAUGHTER, not the 2 boys, KARA...little sweet KARA MICHELETTE, who has grown quite the vocabulary of "get", "go", "no" "dog" "kaka" "paci" "baba" and any other word you say to her and say "Kara say...." and she will repeat it, believe you me. I know I haven't updated in a while, but I will go back to last week on vacation.

I spent Friday at my parents with just Kara and Brandon, we went for a walk to "show her off" to all of Grammy's friends. Two of the friends worked in the big grocery store in Croghan we stopped there to say hello when all of a sudden Kara spotted the banana's...a.k.a "bonnas" well didn't she freak so mommy bought her one. We traveled along to Big Grammy's house and on the way we finished our "bonna" and wanted more so she proceeded to eat the skin, all while saying KaKa, Big Grammy was on her way to church so we turned around and started to head back home to eat a snack, but only Miss Thang wanted another bonna...so back to the grocery store we went a bought another bonna! You would think by seeing her that we never feed her, I keep telling her "skinny baby, this WILL catch up to you"

On Saturday...well, Saturday....long story short, Grammy and Grampie came over to watch Kara while Daddy and Mommy went out to celebrate Mommy's bday. Sadly Mommy and Daddy went out to eat and went grocery shopping...sad...I know!

On Sunday we got all pretty and went to church, then ventured a highway to Syracuse (Central Square, ((West Monroe)) ) to have dinner with my family. The kids did well, but thanks to mother nature is was decent enough outside for the kids to play outside. Kara was into everything, included my bday cake, but with a little prevocation.

Monday and Tuesday were a blur when along came Wednesay...we started packing for our trip and getting stuff around. Let me just note that while on vacation it didn't matter what time Kara went to bed the night before or what time she woke up (one morning 10:00) at 11:30 she was ready for a nap...God love her routine.

**side note, Tyler and Kara are actually getting along, in Tyler's exact words, "Mom, look at your daughter, mom look, your daughter hugging me."**

We set out on Wednesday at 7p.m. (after daddy went to school for a couple hours) for Lake George to the Great Escape Indoor Water Park/Lodge. Lets just say from Watertown to Port Leyden Kara did nothing but vocalize that she was there, we would give her her paci...she would throw it. I finally got so mad I made Tim yell at her, it was at that point a game that I wasn't playing. Not a good start to vacation. She eventually fell asleep but as soon as we got off the exit in Lake George, she was singing like she was wide awake. We got to our hotel room and got settled at 10:30...surprisingly after claiming her room and scoping out her territory she went to bed without a problem.

Now the next three days entailed this...and really other than we had a great time all you need to know is "KARA....NO" Kara loved the water and was completely fearless...which scared the hell out of me...she figured out how to climb in her stroller and used it as a toy, she figured out how to climb into the bathtub and she figured out how to climb on top of the air conditioning/heating unit in the room and look out the window at doggies...there were no dogs just birds. She managed to tell her father the first morning we were there..."shhh, dada...shhhh shhhh" she managed to tell everyone and their brother "HI and BYE" but she hated all the looney toons characters.

Currently, the kids are still playing but I thought I would quickly (my blogs never seem to be quick) tell you how my baby is growing up to be quite the big girl. And now as I close, they aren't playing Tyler is showing her (like she needs to be shown, she can do it alone) how to take every DVD out of the cabinet and empty it to the floor.

Goodnight ALL xxoo

...what would I do...

The last 2 days have been nothing but bringing my head out of my ass. I can say right now that I have one load of laundry in the dryer and one load in the washer...and they are my last. All of the other laundry is put away and my house is picked up. Yes, it may be 8:23 at night and I have yet to eat dinner (its in the microwave, has been heated up twice) I have to credit most of this on one thing...

My best friend...Marybeth came over Wednesday night after her class and sat down with me and made a list. She of all people know and get to listen to how overwhelmed I am and with her working on her Masters in Psychology she decided to come after the kids went to bed and help me with a list. This list, just on a piece of plain computer paper, is the best thing. We sorted out room by room what needs to be done and the frequency, then we highlighted, different colors, who does this...Tim, Me, Brandon, and Shared chore. I felt better after she left and was excited to start. For example, each night after the kids are in bed and before I go to bed take all the laundry and put it in the washer and wash it...the next morning when I am ready to walk out the door, start the dryer (yes I had quite the anxiety about letting my dryer run while I'm gone, but I'm still working on getting over it) when I get home from work take it out, fold it and go put it away to get ready for the next nights. So far, day one went wonderful. Although we were behind again (you wouldn't believe the amount of laundry a family of 5 goes through...I was doing it once a week...overwhelming) Tonight she came over to watch the kids while Tim and I ran some errands (DMV, Stores, etc) While I was gone, she prepared dinner, fed the kids, did my laundry and did my dishes...she didn't stop, she helped me put it all away and pick up my house...then she left. I feel so much better, maybe because she helped me, but because I vowed never to get like this again. Tomorrow we are working on a chore chart for Brandon, because he is old enough now to have responsibility, he wants things, he needs to show us that he can be responsible for things.

Thought I would share that I am almost out of my funk...its been 2 weeks...and tomorrow hopefully is the last...things are starting to look up...thank you so much for the help...

Mom, your annoymous comments always make me cry...thanks for always being that rock that is just a phone call away!!!...you deserve this vacation more than anything!

Let the Hormones Flow

There really is no other way to put this other than, "this fetus is kicking my ass" I have looked so forward to this point, to start, NOT feeling crappy but I just do. I am not happy with myself in so many ways. I want so badly to remember this pregnancy as my last in so many ways, but our lives are just so hectic and I don't think that it's fair to Kara or the boys for that matter to have our lives be just about this baby and not them. I am upset with myself that I'm starting my 2nd trimester at the weight (heavier) than I was the night I went into labor with Kara. I remember that number so vividly and I never wanted to see that number again, but I hit it Jan. 28th, 2008. I am not there and a tad more today. I know it's only going to get worse and I hate the fact that it is. I know that I will remember the good parts but it just bothers me.

With Brandon in Pee Wee Wrestling now, it's hard for me to find time to go to the gym. I used to swim 3 times a week, but I find myself going less and less and I hate that too, but on the other hand am excited that Brandon found something he liked to do. I think after tonights practice the little kids and I are going to start walking for the hour that Brandon is at practice outside. It was so nice out tonight that I just hate sitting in that basement smelling sweaty boys and girls. Hopefully I can keep to that promise and start doing that. Then I come home and it's so overwhelming. I feel with working full-time, coming home, making dinner, going to either swim or something for the kids and coming home and ready to crash I get nothing accomplished at all during the week. I have almost accepted that fact, but it still puts me in a bad mood to see a "messy" house. I feel like since this new carpet has gone in I have done nothing but vacuum it. It is darker than the last but catches everything. But it's Monday, no doubt I will be "bitching" about it still on Friday and it will get done Saturday. I can honestly say looking into the weekend that we have nothing planned, but again, our lives changes so quickly. I would love to get outside doing "outside" work but again, things change so quickly. I was lucky enough to have cleaned well in the livingroom. The upstairs is the main focus now and I just need to make it 6 more weeks to find out the sex of this baby and the work can be done.

I've "petered" out for the night, I'm off to bed early as this morning Tyler decided that 530 was time to raise and shine. Hoping for a better Tuesday

Here we go again

So lately, all I have been thinking about is names. Just like my last pregnancy I have a boys name all picked out, but am struggling with a girls name. We had girls names picked out for Kara, but they changed every other week. We had McKenna, Kennady and settled with Kara. I thought we were all set with this babys name as we had picked it out before we found out I was preggers (yes...I'm that weird, I have always been the type of person to choose names way before. I think I had my first child named at the age of 5 and that was Mallory, also my baby dolls name. NOTE: just ran that by Tim...that name is a no go. ANOTHER NOTE: Brandon just ran by Claire and Tim ignored him...I do like that one...hmmm.

Back to this story. I started to cry today because in 8 weeks (which doesn't sound like a long time, until you say 2 months, I will be finding out what I am having. I have been having a hard time with this pregnancy because this will be my last and I want to cherish every moment so this will be my last child I will be naming. The problem seems to be that the names I like are names that people we know already have. I even called up one of our friends today and said, would it be too weird for the kids if I named the baby Lily? (He name is Liliana) She laughed and said she wouldn't mind, it would probably confuse the kids though.

So as I babble on, I'm stressing already on the names, not sure what we will end up with but until then I will continue to search names.

Slacking

It seems the only time I can find the time to write on here is when the kids are fast asleep and when I've been sitting at the desk writing out bills and I don't want to go sit down because I will surely fall fast asleep.

Things have been going wonderful. Kara continues to amaze me everyday with something new. She turned 13 months old yesterday and she has completed so many milestones in a month. We have gone from wobbling to walking fine to running, yes my peanut is running all over. The doctors said on Friday when she went for a re-check for her bronchitis they said she's so tiny, she hasn't even reached 20 pounds yet. My response to them was, spend a day at my house and watch her try to keep up with her brothers. The more she eats, the more she runs, and the more she burns it all off. I joke with people and tell them that she is never full, we have to tear her away from the table because she would sit in her highchair and eat all night long, she never gets bored. We actually have to cut her off!!! She mimics us in everything that we do, her endless shaking of the head to signal something she is eating is "good", he neverending kisses and her constant falling and her responding with "ohhhh". Tonight on the way home from my parents, Tim and I were listening to the radio and it happened to be our wedding song, well from the backseat we hear her singing along, babbling away, I think we both got teary eyed while we listened to her "sing" her song! I just have to mention as well that Kara has found a new obsession with DOGGIES. Her favorite word and favorite animal by far...I have yet to video her excitement when she sees one, but Friday I was able to take her to the pet store in the mall, I didn't have my phone out quick enough to catch her expression...it will be imprinted in my mind for a while...it was priceless!

Tim continues to go to school and bust his @$$ until May. We are so proud of Daddy for his hard work but at the same time, soooo ready for May so he can be home with us and we can incorporate him into our family routine.

Brandon is in the "girl" world now. He has been chatting with a girl who's in his grade for about a month now everynight...sometimes 2 or 3 times a night (we have to put a stop or they would talk ALLL NIGHT). Well Friday Kayla called and she asked Brandon to spend Saturday with her at her house, so I of course played the parent-role (which I should mention that it doesn't seem that long ago I was asking my mother to go to someones house) and said, "well I need to talk to her mother" thinking that it would trigger these young children to say, nevermind, but nope....on the phone her mother came. We informally introduced ourselves and I said the kids wanted to get together and she said, yup I was thinking tomorrow for a couple hours. So of course we let him. I was shocked and surprised. They are only 9...almost 10, but still...so I called Daddy and Daddy laughed and was as shocked as I was. So Saturday came and he got up early, showered, brushed his teeth and God love him, came downstairs with "play" jeans on (the ones with holes in them)...Mommy dearest quickly said..."oh, no" in the meantime I folded laundry to find clean school jeans and before Daddy got home from work to take him, I cut his hair and he "gussied" all up for his "girlfriend" That's Brandons life, but he is doing wonderfully in school and the only stipulation is that he continues to do well or the phone will get taken away.

Tyler has excelled in school to where I have to attend a meeting this week to have him de-classified as a preschool child with a disability. Tyler has come so far in such a few months that they see no reasoning to keep him labeled. This is wonderful and I am so proud of Tyler for doing so well in school, but I have to admit on the other hand we will be paying more for Tyler's school tuition, but we are also looking and exploring our options. It is so easy for Tyler to come to school with me every morning and not make the extra stop every morning, but on the other hand, I'm always looking for ways we can save money. He continues to see his mother, but that will soon be dwindling hopefully. Tim filed paperwork on Wednesday of last week to have her rights suspended until an investigation into Heidi's household is complete. This is another long story that would take me awhile...but I'm sure everyone gets the jist...she's an unfit mother and we just won't stand for that little boy to be treated that dirt. To her, he's just money in her pocket! Sad, I know!

Nothing new in my life...I'm putsing along...feeling chubby as ever. I'm tired but I find if I keep myself going I don't tend to fall asleep. I've been having trouble sleeping at night, something I experienced toward the end of my pregnancy with Kara, but I talked to the doctor and I'm more than able to take Tylenol P.M. I will only be taking it when Tim is home with me though. It's always a given that I don't sleep when Tim is not home, and I don't think that will ever change, unless of course if we ever move in with my parents (JUST KIDDING MOM) I'm beginning to accept this pregnancy more and at the same time I'm a little saddened that this will be my last pregnancy. I want to cherish every moment but at times, I find it hard to pay attention to this person growing inside me, when I have this amazing little girl that I need to give my attention to as much as I can before this baby is born. It's hard, I find myself reading every magazine article in the Parenting Magazine and every online article on Babycenter.com.

Everything will be ok...I'm convinced. Our lives are starting to get on track, we have some major goals accomplished, some so close ahead and we continue to look forward as our family will be complete in 6 short months!

9 weeks and counting...

Yes, I know, I'm only 9 weeks. I can't believe that's it, but all in all it's okay! Last week was pretty much whilwind of sickness throughout our house. I was off 2 days last week, although I actually attempted to go to work and as soon as they heard me coughing they sent me home. I guess it's better than chancing the kids to sickness and having it loop around and us catch it again!

I spent a couple days just vegging out and catching up on sleep, or so I thought! We got caught up on a lot of stuff and planned our Valentines Day Festivities. Long story (they usually are) short Brandon stayed with us this weekend (his "mother's" weekend) and we made it a family V-day! We woke up Saturday morning and headed out to Syracuse to go Furniture shopping. We arrived in Syracuse a little later than expected (Miss. Kara wanted to sleep in) and spent about an hour and a half in the furniture store, we found what we wanted and dickered a little bit on the price and we were out of there. We went over to Great Northern and looked around, had a pretzel for lunch because we were anticipating a big dinner at OLIVE GARDEN...we met up with my cousin, her hubby, and daughter chatted with them for a while and joked at how busy OG would be...well needless to say, I called OG around 5p.m. and it was a 2 hour wait to eat. Well that royally pissed me off so I just said lets go home! On our way back to 81N I decided to call around and we ended up at Spaghetti Warehouse...what a great place, we want to go next time when it's not so busy...

Hope everyone had a great Valentines Day.

xxoo

Mixed Emotions

So much has happened in our lives in the past 2 weeks there is no way I can relive it all and type it all down. Most everyone knows but long story short...Tim lost a AWESOME Friend and Co-worker Jan 30th to a senseless act and our lives will never be the same when Daddy walks out the door.

Now that I've started I don't think I can stop...my husband helps people he shouldn't have to let his guard down when he goes into a house to help someone ailing of pain or suffering. My husband is not in the military nor he is a policeman who both have extensive training with guns to protect themselves along with the proper equipment. I often laugh when people ask me what he has for protection and I say...scissors. And honestly up until this happened Tim never carried scissors with him. I understand what military and police officer's wives go through now, but never did I ever think living here in the BIG city of Watertown would we ever have to worry about Daddy working...yes I do occasionally get worried on Friday and Saturday nights but since this...it's just no sleep at all worried. And the moral to the story is that those military wives and police officer's wives chose to marry those men in those professions. I married my man because I love him, I'm proud of what he does and I could go on. Never, ever in my life did I think I would have to worry this much. I'm sure it will fade but not anytime soon. That is one week I never want to relive. Granted, it's not over for Tim, he still has the "what if's" and the "well's" and I'm sure he will for a long time. I got the pleasure of doing a trip with Mark during my pregnancy...I have to share...When I was pregnant and working at Guilfoyle doing Trips I got a call the night before to be in quarters at 8a.m. that I was taking a gentleman from Alex Bay to Syracuse for a doctors appointment and back home. Already knowing that would be a long day I asked the dispatcher who my partner was, he said Mark Davis...a new kid. I said great the new kid everyone is complaining about, he wears his hat backwards, he just looks like a doof and he is probably useless.

I learned more about Mark Davis that day than I can tell you. Mark introduced himself to me when we got to quarters, Mark asked me how I was feeling (he knew I was prego) he told me that he personally knows this guy and he will take care of most of the lifting for me. Well when we walked into this guys house little did I know he had no legs was completely on life support and definitley needed 2 people. Mark and I lifted this guy and he kept his eye on me. Noticing that I gaged a few times because of the smell he made up this excuse for me to go get something in the bus, he winked and I knew he told me to go outside to get fresh air. I drove on the way down while he monitored the patient and when we got to the appointment we chatted while this man was in his appointment. He asked me how I was feeling and if I could handle monitoring him on the way back (this was the rule at GEMS) I said yes, and he said well if you can't I have no problem doing it. All the way home he kept asking how I was because he knew this man stunk!!! He even stopped in Central Square at Burger King to let me get fresh air! I was so pleased to have gotten to go with Mark that day. Just an all around nice guy, I was so honored to know him and call him my friend. He will forever be honored and missed in this home.

My next quick topic before I hit the couch is this Octuplet mother...normally I'm not a TV watcher but today was different, today I laid in bed all day feeling like I was either going to deliver this baby TODAY or die...I was watching Dr. Phil and all I have to say is WHO CARES HOW MANY KIDS SHE HAS....she doesn't have the Dugger's beat yet...yes John and Kate and the Ferrill Five...yes...but honestly I could care less. I'm glad she doesn't live in our state because even though we don't pay child support for Tim's Ex...we pay for her to have Food Stamps and Housing, etc...(I really shoudn't be that way) I couldn't possibly imagine paying for this lady who has no job, no husband and lives off her children's Social Security Disability. But on the other hand, my great Christian self comes out and says no...it's kind of wrong that she is doing this, but again the next breath says who cares...apparently she only did it for the publicity which is ethically wrong in my book.

xxoo

P.S. anyone else noticed that Kate Gosselin just looks horrible and not so down to earth anymore??? She's trying to hard on her image. Again, noticed that on Dr. Phil today. I do give these woman credit because they have 8 and 14 respectively I can't even manage the 3...almost 4 I got...poor kids get called the wrong name all the time!

The Past Year

I've been fighting back tears all of last night and today and I'm finally gonna let them go (I do apologize, some tears may be hormones kicking in, but the other tears are just "normal" so they all say)

While rocking Kara to sleep last night (I don't usually do this, I just wanted to after her birthday party yesterday) I remineced the past year and just cried. She sat staring up at me and I cried harder. I realized that I am going to write this down after I type it, and keep it in her baby book for her to reflect back on when she's older. Hopefully she will appreciate it.

One year ago today I was sitting in this exact chair rocking and talking to your Daddy about all the things I wanted in life for you. Little did I know you would make your appearance in less than 12 hours. My water broke while I was sleeping at 12:55 a.m. on January 28th. I sat up quickly in bed and called for Daddy who flipped the switch on and watched in total amazement as my "water" broke all over. I went into the bathroom and sat on the toilet while Daddy called the doctor and called Grandma and I think he even texted a couple people!! He checked on me while he called for Brandon to wake up, when Brandon finally woke up and realized what was going on, the rest was pretty much a blur until we got out the door. Mommy put a towel between her legs, put on her pants and went downstairs and waited for Daddy. We took Brandon to Uncle Doug and Aunt Trina's house and then went to the hospital. Daddy called everyone (at 1:30a.m.) on the way to the hospital to tell them that you were coming soon. When we got to the hospital Daddy was sure that Mommy was going to take a wheelchair to the Maternity Floor...Mommy was sure that she was going to walk. We got up to the Maternity Floor and were greeted by many nurses who took care of Mommy. Soon after Mommy was "hooked" up to monitors Grammie and Grampie showed up. It was less than 12 hours later and you came into this world. Your first cry was immediately breath taking and I just cried along with you. I was so happy and in total amazment that you were really here. You had so many visitors in the hospital along with the wonderful nurses you had. Nurse Carla and Nurse Kari were the greatest. We stayed in the hospital for 2 days and then Daddy and Brandon came to get us and take us home...this was the start of your new life...

When we first brought you home Mommy didn't put you down much, I just wanted to hold you all the time. On the Friday you came home Mommy and Daddy along with you went to spend the weekend at Grammie and Grampies you had so many family members you had to meet. Sunday was Superbowl so we had plans to eat all day at their house. We left during half-time to come back home. We were watching the last 32 seconds of the game while I was feeding you your bottle when all of a sudden I looked down because you made a noise. You weren't breathing and started to turn blue. Mommy quickly gave you to Daddy who started to blow in your face and pat your back. You eventually took a breath but were limp and not acting like "yourself" We waited a minute while Mommy went hysterical then Daddy called the doctor. We didn't wait for him to call back we just went to the hospital where they took us right in. Mommy was hysterical most of the night, but luckily we had so wonderful friends that were working to help Mommy. We had to stay at the hospital so they could run tests on you and see why you stopped breathing because you did it again in front of the doctor. We stayed for 4 days until they ruled out everything. It was a very hard 4 days, all the poking and prodding they did on you Mommy just didn't want them hurting her baby. At the end of 4 days we got to go home but not without an Apnea Monitor. Dr. Victoria gave us a monitor that you had to wear around all the time to make sure and to alert us when you stopped breathing. We had to simply "nudge" you and wake you up.

This was also your first trip to Syracuse. At 12 days old you got to drive to Syracuse and go to the Pediatric Sleep Clinic at St. Joseph's Hospital. Mommy, Daddy and Grammie made a day of it, we took you to the Mall and out to lunch. We packed bags because we didn't know if you were going to be admitted or not, but luckily we were told to keep monitoring it that it could possibly be a case of bad Acid Reflux. You wore the monitor for 3 months on and off, mostly at night! We eventually became greatful of that machine. The doctors put you on medicine call Zantac that we put in your bottle and you didn't even know it!! You did so well.

In April, many things happened, with the beginning being the death of your Great Grandmother Dot!! You never got to meet her but she heard all about you from Grampie he sure bragged about you and showed her pictures on their last trip to Florida. The day she died we were at Grammie and Grampie's and got to say good-bye to her before she died. She was sick with Cancer and needed to go be with God. We sure wished you would have known her, she would have just "eaten you up" Also in April, on Mommy's birthday you were baptized at Mommy's church in Croghan. Great Uncle Kim and Aunt MaryAnn were your Godparents. "Aunt Bethie and "Uncle Joe Joe", Patrick, Livi and Courtney also came to see you baptized. We had a little party at Grammie and Grampie's afterward.

In May we started building our new deck after the pool was put in. You loved it outside. On Daddy's birthday May 10th after finishing the deck Grammie and Grampie took you home to spend the night so Mommy and Daddy could spend some time together for Daddy's birthday. This was the first time we left you for this long. Mommy cried for about an hour until Daddy convinced her it was ok. The next day was Mother's Day so as a surprise Mommy and Daddy got up real early and drove to Croghan to go to church with Grammie and Grampie and to see you. We went and had a nice dinner out and then came home. This was Mommy's first Mother's Day.

In the summer months we did a lot as a family. You loved the pool and often "yelled" at Brandon while he was swimming and she even got to go into the pool with Grampie. Even though their pool was much much cooler than ours she got to stay in for a little bit. The summer also brought on many trips to the ER with fevers which later were found out to be viruses and teeth. Over July 4th we woke up to find our princess will a 104.7 temp. We packed up woke up my Grammie and headed to Watertown cooling you with a washcloth all the way. I held you all the way there (Yes, Britany Spears wanna-be) We got there only to wait for 3 hours and by then her fever was down.

Labor Day came and went with actually another fever...must be those patriotic holidays. School started back up and then came our blessing from above...

FIONA!!! We found Fiona from one of Mommy's co-workers who lives across the road from Fiona she told me to give her a call and it just so happened she had openings...FOR ALL THE KIDS. We went and met her and immediately fell in love with her. You loved her too.

September was a busy busy month. Mommy and Daddy got married on September 20th. We had family in from all over the U.S and they were staying with US!! The week before the wedding was extremely stressful, but we made it through. You and Tyler were pulled down the isle by Brandon. You both looked so adorable. You stayed the night in a hotel with Grammie and Grampie while Mommy and Daddy stayed in another hotel. The next day we were so happy to see you...we missed you. On September 22, Mommy, Daddy and You traveled to Atlantic City, NJ for our "babymoon" we had so much fun. You enjoyed so many things...all new to you. You got to put your feet in the Ocean, ate at all sorts of restaurants and walked up and down the boardwalk!! We got back safe and sound and missed your brothers.

In October we gained full custody of your brother Tyler and he moved in and got quickly adjusted. You love playing with him and lately all you do is defend yourself to him...knocking him over and playing "rough" with him.

Your first Thanksgiving was in November we spent it with Uncle Mark and Aunt Deb at their house with all of Grampies family. Grammie fed you turkey and you loved it...Surprise!

Then came your very first Christmas...Mommy was so emotional, we actually let you play with your presents while we were wrapping them, but you didn't have a clue!! We went to Uncle Mark and Aunt Deb's for Christmas Eve with Grammie and Grampie and then Daddy, Mommy, You and Brandon went back to their house for the night. We got up and went to church and then came back to open presents. You had more fun playing with the wrapping paper and the boxes than the presents!! In all you had 4 Christmas' The next 3 days following Christmas were filled with more presents.

Here were are in January already. Mommy remembered last January as being on "minor bedrest" Last January was quite boring and went by so slow. I remembered re-doing your room and re-arranging so many times to have it perfect. And now here we are you're already 1. We had an amazing party at Gramma and Grampie's with family in attendace. Uncle Kim, Aunt MaryAnn, Reah, Aunt Teresa, Uncle Craig, Jenn, Savannah, Caitlin, Great Grammie, and Uncle Bruce came to your party. You just loved your cake...heres a picture.

Also in January, Mommy and Daddy found out they were expecting another baby. So next year on your 2nd birthday you will be a big sister.

Kara Michelette, you are truly a dream come true. Thank you for changing my life. My love for you grows more everyday. Sometimes I just sit and watch you in total amazement all that you have learned in the past year it just simply amazes me! I love you pretty!


this post was done over a 4 day period...love this busy life...thanks for reading.

We're Doing It AGAIN!!!

Yes, please get the rolling of the eyes, they "holy shits", the "wow, so soon(s)" comments out of your system before reading on...

It's "un"official but because I have an extremely large family who already knows and a 3 year old son that has not stopped talking about it since the day he found out I decided that I probably ought to tell people before I get the "why didn't you tell me(s)" So, yes, Tim and I have been blessed with baby number 2 (4). I found out after much procrastination last Friday. Tim has been telling me he thinks I am pregnant by the way I am acting, I have been schulffing it off saying he's nuts. Yes, I admit, I have been more "bitchier" than normal, but I just can, I'm the mommy and I can. So we actually made a bet at dinner last Friday night that I am, so of course I hate to lose so I bought a test and when we got home ran right upstairs and took it and honestly I didn't think it would be positive but their was no 2 minute wait, that sucker was positive immediately. I began to cry, out of excitement/holy shitness/what am I going to do now/nerves/I lost a bet. All the emotions just came screaming down and just like with Kara I sat in the bathroom close to an house wondering what to do, "how am I going to tell my parents" much like a teenager would wonder but then I realized that even though I have 3 kids and my life is crazy and people look at us funny, I am married, own a home, have a full-time job, and pay my own bills, and have a very supporting husband with an amazing and rewarding job, so what am I worried about. I cried most of Friday night watching Kara play and just be so "grown up" She played with Brandon and us and I just cried. I can't believe she will be 1 next week, I am just at awe and I can't even talk or type about it because tears come to my eyes. My baby that I have dreamed and prayed for is growing up. It will be hard to have another one when I have given so much love to this little girl. It shall be interesting.

On that note, she has grown to be the walker/talker. She is so darn funny that I often just watch her without her knowing and laugh because of the things she does. With the help of Tyler she has learned that cars go on the floor and make the "Raspberry" sounds and that its fun to try to race cars, she has learned to fight and stand up for herself when her brother tries to take a toy away. Whether it be slap or hit or pull hair she will get her toy back or the one he has because she is the princess. Yes, we do punish her after we get done laughing! She has begun taking Mom and Tot swim lessons at the YMCA on Wednesday night. She is funny splashing and playing with other kids, she continues to go to "Ona's" and has actually learned a lot from playing with other children, actually today, she didn't want to leave! Because of her attitude and personality she has landed herself in Time Out at Fiona's a couple of times, she just thinks the word NO is too funny.

Tyler continues to make WONDERFUL strides at Preschool. He as well as Kara have learned that Mommy and Daddy don't have to be around 24/7 and that being away for a while is cool. I have a hard time getting him to leave school and just before Christmas he would whine and cry when he would see me at school, now he looks at me, blows me a kiss and continues what he is doing. I'm still so proud of him and what he has accomplished. We still have issues with his behavior at times, but we may have pinpointed much of that with being tired. We are still in the process of potty training, its getting better with the help of school. His speech is improving and he now has imaginary friends so when he thinks we aren't listening he jabbers to his friends. And my most favorite and recent thing is that he now says KARA not KWAWA. It's so unbelievably cute, his R's have made progress. Presently I am listening to Tyler scold his teachers Bridget and Kristin and his friends Anna, Cassie and Nate...all real people but not in my house!

Brandon has started playing the recorder for music class so currently I am listening to him toot his horn in his bedroom after an hour of "Mom, listen to this, do you like this song" Mom, I now know what you had to deal with; I'm sorry. Brandon has also started swim lessons on Wednesday night and swims like a fish. He will be our swimmer, we hope he continues to like it and excel in something he likes.

Tim also started back school last night. It was nice to have a month off with him being home, but it was a quick month and believe me we found stuff to do on those "off" nights. It seems we are still constantly on the go to where we had to change routine of things. We try to either eat really early (now that I get home at 2:45...love the school system) or really late like after swim lessons. But lately, while Tim works we like to stay in on cold nights (like tonight) and be in our pj's by 4!!! It's 5:10 and I'm looking forward to bed...sad isn't it.

I haven't been to the doctor yet, and I hate to jinx stuff, but hopefullly all is well. Everyone at work is taking bets because they laugh at me because I honestly don't know my last period, I haven't had one in so long. So today a co-worker really asked me, what would you do if they said you were due like next month? I laughed and then thought about that in depth...wow, February 6th can't come soon enough. Thanks to the Baby Boom at Fort Drum it's almost impossible to see a doctor.

Sorry for the long update, but I haven't updated on everyone in a while!! XXOO

Resolutions 2009

Oh, as many people say..."same resolution shit...different year" Yup, that's me...for the 5th year in a row, same resolution. I think my resolution last year might have been split between weight and giving birth to what I thought was a HUGE baby last year at this time, but obviously my plan backfired...not only didn't I lose weight, but the baby waited 27 more days to come out!!

This year, I've honestly, truly, compasionately (sp) taken a whole new step on not only "weigh loss" per say, but "healthier styles" I have finally hit rock bottom and been in a "funk" for about a week or two. It officially hit this past weekend. I weighed myself at my mothers and as much as I really don't need the "blogger world" to know because I'm unbelievably embarassed, I weigh more now than I ever have and I weigh more than I ever did while I was pregnant with Kara.

My thyroid (lack of one) may have something to do with it, but I'm sick and tired of using that as an excuse every damn time. Yes, I am on the highest dose I have EVER been and the doctors did tell me that after Kara my dose would lower, but it has only gone up...I've researched and researched, but it may come down to another opinion...possibly closer to home...but first...here's the new 09 plan.

• we WILL be utilizing our YMCA membership...even the daycare ladies said...we didn't think you would come back when we went tonight. I have started Water Aerobics Mon, Tues and Thurs nights and the kids do swim lessons on Wednesday nights!!
• I will be cooking more, eating out less...yes Mom, you think this is impossible, but convienence is the story of our life.
• I will be cooking with more whole grains, which means switching the kids to wheat bread, which yes, makes Brandon not too happy, but the 2 little ones, don't have a clue. Tim...whole other story...if he's hungry enough...he'll eat right?
• attending church as a family! Which again, may prove impossible after this weekend. Many of you are probably thinking...Tyler...nope my Tyler with a vagina...KARA....Holy Monster.
• and last but certainly not least...ME...Tim and I have agreed to give me one night alone, even if it is going to aerobics without taking all 3 kids to drop off...I get to go alone. He will make his class nights his alone nights, which gives me my nights!

There are many more, but it's more of a let's do this as a family year. I am so glad to have all 3 kids healthy and getting them involved in the community. This year, I want to be more active as a family. But until May, it will be hard, but we will be doing it as best as we can for now!

On another note, until I sign off for tonight, I just have to tell you that the first night of Water Aerobics went great....but I am extremely sore and irratible because I'm exhausted...when I told Tim I was going back tomorrow, he giggled and said...I love you hunny! Just remember I will help you and encourage you!